Sorry for . . . whatever, I'm only just barely able to tolerate this medication dose still. Hopefully it will improve soon. I'm not to go down again for at least another week (basically each time I go down I'm going to feel worse again). But I promised illustrated chipmunk stories; I shall deliver. I took these in a light drizzle/through glass, so they're not great, but I did what I could.

( ILLUSTRATED CHIPMUNK STORIES! x7 pics. )

Since you're here, help yourself to some girls playing a giant piano.

I need this printed on a t-shirt or something, since it seems to be my obligatory motto. :| My steri-strips are off now, incisions looking pretty good; I thought I was past it hurting (just uncomfy), but then today activity aggravated it I guess and I spent several hours unable to move much. They're still having to tweak my steroid dosage, as well, prior to even starting to wean me off it; so I'm having lots of fun alternating between being too tired to move and too anxious I can't focus. I do feel like . . . there's a weight that got lifted, and a few symptoms have improved already, but it's not magic and it won't be fast.

If we have a loose end of importance, please remind me. It probably would be from stress anyway, but my brain is still medically fried and I may have honestly forgotten. As I'm hopefully becoming able to do it, I know I need to re-prioritize a lot and just try to focus on the things that are most important. That's still a challenge now since I am not together and the list of things I CAN do versus the things I need or want to do doesn't match up well . . . but I will try and get life back on track.

Because my brother was at the GDC (Game Developer's Conference) last weekend, I got his extra swag, in the form of an advance copy of the new DS game Rhythm Heaven. Well, I only got around to playing it a day early, but since it launched on Sunday that means you can get it. It's technically a sequel to a Japan-only GBA game; apparently it was co-developed by the producer of Morning Musume . . . Anyhow consider it recommended, I think it's a real general-appeal game.
( very brief opinions. )

Your holiday-related link: spice up religions teaching with "fun visual representation(s) of each plague" . . .

From the guy who did the really cool Mario Kart video: "Best of Elevator".

You can also have an article about the pretty depressing "dark side" of Dubai but I doubt anyone will read that. Messed up, sci-fi dystopian stuff though. Too bad it's real.

*edit* And even now I remember things :P Thank you jedijenchan for the flowers, they're lovely (geh I forgot to take a photo earlier) and that was really sweet and thoughtful of you.

I thought maybe I'd get to more today but . . . didn't. Still almost awake but I have to be up again in 6 hours to go get second blood draw (same thing on Saturday), not counting alarm to take the medication that's part of the test . . . fun times. Have some videos from a saved file meanwhile. Though briefly thanks to people who have been supporting me, with the increasing pile of sh*t I'm under . . . don't know what I'd do without your help.

Definitely watch Oktapodi - it's very short and the animation is deathly cute. And I'm not just saying that because I'm obsessed with octopi.
( Oscar-nominated short animation )

Um I have other things to deal with also and actually I have to run right now but this CANNOT POSSIBLY WAIT

Paging all people who have watched the new Doctor Who . . . watch this now. Not optional. *looks pointedly at stephen_poon, 1ucifer and lunaneko for certain* Also thank 0bscurity for it.
( should be embedded for those who prefer )
I expect you to learn this song, stephen_poon.

I will forget to say if I don't tack it on this post: I finally got my biopsy results Friday - normal. So I have to wait on a follow-up on the 28th to see whether there is any further pursuit of the test results that *weren't* normal. Ah, medical Battleship . . .

I've been thinking a lot again lately - my worst habit, right? I was worried for a while that I was repressing emotions and that was why I've been feeling strangely level . . . not happy, that's different, but level. But looking back I think that a lot of the times when the reaction is to cry or pitch a fit it's because you feel that things are happening TO you and are out of your control. If you take responsibility, it's a double-edged sword -because you run the risk of blaming yourself for things you can't control and that aren't your fault. (I come from a proud familial tradition of guilt and I never ever forget any mistake I think I've made.) But it also puts the power in your hands - if you want something to change, you can change it. Ultimately, why would anyone want to be a victim of life? Mind you, that's NOT true about everything - some things really aren't in your control and there's nothing wrong with being upset by them. I'm talking about learning to tell the difference. Otherwise, ALL the good things that happen to you are coincidence or luck - and the bad things, you're the universe's bitch. Who wants that? (Unlike in anime/manga, being the universe's bitch does not get you cool powers, hot BF/GF, or a giant robot.)

There are a lot of things over which we have no power at all and can never change; but people have so much more power than they know. The bad thing that happens to us when we grow up is that we stop believing in the possible; that's probably why they need kids to pilot giant robots, because adults wouldn't believe they could. We learn to be afraid of possibility and take the easy path, and I am long since certain that the easy path is almost always the wrong one. Resistance builds strength, we know that in workouts, why should it be different in life? If you can unlearn being afraid, then all those possibilities are open again, aren't they . . .?

Of course, there is a wide, toothy chasm between resolve and realization. I don't know what to do with myself feeling okay and *that* is causing anxiety. The image I have is sitting in a rowboat on the ocean - I've been so preoccupied for so long with weathering the storm that I don't know what to do with calm. What direction was I headed? Am I even moving? I'm not paddling hard enough. Am I anchored down without knowing it? Is it just that the opposite shore is so far off it only seems like I'm going nowhere? And shouldn't I be ferrying other people in this boat? (But whether or not to be driftwood - that's a choice.)

Yes, doing is worth a thousand times thinking. But the thinking is about forgiving myself for some things so I can move forward. I let everything that mattered fall apart without even realizing, and I hardly know where to begin to fix it. I'm talking about it because . . . well, words are powerful, too, aren't they? For me and maybe for other people.

Since you are here, have a warm-fuzzies music video I meant to share some time ago. I do not promise that children will come out from under your coffee table but that may be just as well.
( happy song for lonely people )

( lyrics/translation )

Hah, I knew there was a reason I never do memes. Oh well lol. Substantive post is upcoming, I'm almost done with my NYCC report but I "have" to watch Lost. Also I heard from the doctor's office about the liver biopsy (after I called) - they had to send the tests out of state.

Please put on appropriate safety gear while I have a fangirl moment. OMFG. Adam and Jamie from Mythbusters are guesting on CSI: next week. Apparently it involves tinfoil hats and flaming mannequins. I knew there was a reason to live. At least until Thursday night at 8PM CST (CBS). If you don't watch CSI, when they do silly, it's pretty amazing.

Also, have an encouragement video, courtesy of vintage Sesame Street, which I was inspired to track down by the very awesome Paper Children fad thing on deviantART. Have I posted this before? Classic animation work, anyway.
"Quitting is no fun."
"Neither is falling off an eggbeater!"
Teeny Little Superguy - "Eggbeater"

No clever post of any sort, I'm not that into April Fool's, so no tricking you into clicking on things that aren't what I said. I can do that the rest of the year more effectively. :X And I need to spend today finishing up work - part-time job via my father for one of his clients, research thing. Also have course that I need to get incomplete removed on - long story, not interesting - so will be AWOL much of this week probably. Anyhow.

IGN: winners of everything: Legend of Zelda live action trailer. (From adverse.)

Okay so I would have been more all over it if Link was really hot but what can you do lol. (He'd probably have to be Asian and/or a girl.)